♠ Harper’s BAZAAR & ION Orchard Photography Awards 2013 is back again! ♥
The winning photographers will stand to receive these amazing prizes:
1st Prize: An exotic 5D/4N full-package stay for two in a Spa Pool Villa at Hilton Shillim Estate Retreat & Spa, India (worth over S$6,000), a Balmain Watch Elegance (worth $1,400) and $2,000 ION Orchard shopping vouchers.
2nd prize: A relaxing 4D/3N full package stay for two in the King Ocean Suite at Hilton Pattaya, Thailand (worth over S$6,000), a Balmain Watch Elegance (worth $1,120) and $1,000 ION Orchard shopping vouchers.
Details for the Photography Awards as follows: How to Enter
The Brief It’s all about Singapore! What makes us “Uniquely Singapore”? How do you capture the essence of Singapore’s heritage and culture, while still incorporating the beauty of its fashion, lifestyle and the arts? You could be inspired by the coffee shops at Katong, the night lights of Chinatown or the nightlife at Clarke Quay.
Entry submission Please submit a 200- to 300-word description of how ION Orchard has inspired your shoot thematically along with three to five digital images— strictly. The competition is open to all amateur or emerging professional photographers currently residing in Singapore and not currently working for a nationwide publication. The winner will be judged on his or her creativity, originality, effort and ability to produce work that is on par with the standards of Harper’s BAZAAR. Images must NOT be shot at any other shopping mall or any identifiable commercial landmark that would be of conflict to ION Orchard.
The Judging Criteria 1. Relevance to Singapore/fashion/ arts/architecture/culture 2. Composition/arrangement (Use of the best angle and well-placed subject matter) 3. Focus/Sharpness (Is the central object in the photo in focus? Or is it an intentional effect to enhance the image artistically?) 4. Use of lighting (Wherever natural lighting has been utilised, has the photographer used it to his/her advantage?) 5. Originality/creativity (Does the photo demonstrate originality and creative thought?) 6. Effective visual use of the location 7. Inspiration of ION Orchard in the photos and in the descriptions
To Enter: Email your entries to bazaar@sph.com.sg with Harper’s BAZAAR and ION Orchard Photography Awards 2013 Application as the subject title. Please state your name, address, and contact number. Entries exceeding 2MB are to be compressed and sent with a downloadable link.A 200- to 300-word description can be included in the email or saved in a separate word document.
Terms and Conditions Harper’s BAZAAR reserves all rights to the images submitted for this competition. The closing date for submissions is 8 May, 2013.
Do grab a copy of Harper’s BAZAAR’s January 2013 issue for full details.
Have fun with your shoots and all the best! :D
Magdalena Frackowiak Sports “Spring’s Key Pieces” for H&M
Spring’s Key Looks – H&M taps leading model Magdalena Frackowiak for its latest style book highlighting the key pieces of spring. The Polish beauty dons a delightful mix of floral prints, stripe patterns and lightweight knits in the sunny images with a hint of retro style.
Above: The Leopard Blazer: This printed blazer is the statement style this Spring. Mix with roll-up shorts and a skinny belt for a more casual feel.
The Print Pant – These narrow printed pants create a well dressed yet casual look. Master the chic style in a mix of accessories; the minimalist clutch and black-and-white ballet flats are a must.
The Leather Skirt – This leather mini creates a feminine look with attitude. Pair with a bold belt to enhance the waist and mix with ballet flats.
The Biker Jacket: This biker jacket adds a modern edge to an everyday look. Go for a cropped style and match with layers of metallic cuffs to give it an extra dimension.
The Graphic Dress: Graphic prints in black and white create a feminine and sharp look. Set the tone with metal bracelets and a high, straight and black heel.
The Loose Fit Tee: Wear your volume in vertical stripes. Let a loose fit tee create an everyday ease; mix with a clean clutch for a sharp contrast.
The Monochrome Print: Bold prints create a clean yet striking look. Balance the look with monochromatic styles and graphic black and white.
The Blouse Shirt: Get instant chic this Spring. Go for a fluid black style and pair with floral printed leggings for everyday glamour.
The Summer Knit: Fine, airy knits in pale hues create a smooth silhouette. Summer knits meet sharp geometric prints in pants and accessories.
The Oversized Handbag: Meet this season’s key accessory – the large satchel. This oversized bag in crisp white adds a new feel to every style.
There was a wedding which I’ve been anticipating to attend. Because of her.
I wanted to be there to witness true love. To watch her glow of happiness, bliss and God’s favours. Blessings.
This is the first song that made me tear that day. I couldn’t help it.
The march-in. So hauntingly beautiful the melody and lyrics harvest peacefully in my mind.
Tonight I found it again. And couldn’t stop listening to it ever since.
Turning Pages by Sleeping At Last
(Official soundtrack of The Twilight Sage: Breaking Dawn Pt 1)
I’ve waited a hundred years. But I’d wait a million more for you. Nothing prepared me for What the privilege of being yours would do.
If I had only felt the warmth within your touch, If I had only seen how you smile when you blush, Or how you curl your lip when you concentrate enough, I would have known what I was living for all along. What I’ve been living for.
Your love is my turning page, Where only the sweetest words remain. Every kiss is a cursive line, Every touch is a redefining phrase.
I surrender who I’ve been for who you are, For nothing makes me stronger than your fragile heart. If I had only felt how it feels to be yours, Well, I would have known what I’ve been living for all along. What I’ve been living for.
Though we’re tethered to the story we must tell, When I saw you, well, I knew we’d tell it well. With a whisper, we will tame the vicious seas. Like a feather bringing kingdoms to their knees.
Let’s just say every girl would like a love story like Twilight’s. Edward & Bella’s.
I’ve long heard of Essensuals (Bugis) the “star-studded” hair salon that styles and hosts many popular bloggers – they always emerge out of the “hair heaven/haven” looking gorgeous and hair perfectly dryer-blown, with every strand in place. And now….I’ve got my chance of being one of them!
First and foremost, thank you Bryan, Director of Essensuals Bugis for the opportunity to save my hair from its wretched state (I always have hair stylists telling me how dry and lack of nourishment my hair is) and keep them beautiful and shiny and HEALTHY as frequently and as long as possible.
Also thank you my fellow blogger girlfriend Fidelis and Isabel (stylist at Essensuals) for the recommendation. Love you girls!
Located just above Burger King (beside Bugis Street/Village and directly opposite Bugis Junction), Essensuals is a great place to pamper your hair – conveniently right smack in town! Stepping into the salon, it’s like another world; plenty of mirrors, modern aesthetics and furnishing, and a overall a “feel-good” environment you know you can relax in while being treated like a king/queen (your hair, at least)!
And where I was sitting, just beside the Christmas tree!
To show my frizzy, unkempt hair before the Japanese Hair Spa treatment, especially after dyeing. I could feel the ends of hair fizzling away from coarseness and dryness! Eeeeks really needed a good treatment! S.O.S.!!! How did I manage to smile? Hmmm.
Transformation!!!
Isabel is now my “personal stylist” and she’ll be making me beautiful every time I return to Essensuals. Love the Japanese loose curls she styled for me! I have very thick hair so it usually takes very long (due to the many layers of hair) to do my hair but she was so patient and skilled at it!
I’ve tried so many types of treatment at several salons but I really love this Japanese hair spa treatment! The experience is so enjoyable and fuss free – why?
Those I’ve previously tried are usually too warm for my head and neck – sometimes to the extent of being too hot and uncomfortable. But I’ve got to bear with it right? Unpleasant, nonetheless.
Water droplets from the steam might also roll down the sides of your face or worse, down your face onto your nose and you have to constantly wipe them away. Urgh?! And I can’t text on my phone because I can’t see clearly!
This Japanese hair spa treatment – I have nothing but praises! Certainly not because it’s sponsored and I’m now one of Essensuals’ ambassadors; I was even texting Bryan during the treatment telling him how good I felt.
Firstly, the “blue light” coming from the treatment machine – cam-whore time! :P makes your face look good while taking pictures! HEHHEHEE.
Secondly, there was no hot steam! Just a cooling light mist surrounding your head and face. Very pleasant and comfortable, it doesn’t affect your vision at all and you can happily read your magazines or play with your phone.
Thirdly, only 10 short minutes! Short and sweet, unlike the typical 15-25 minutes I had to endure before.
THUMBS UP! <3
After the treatment, you’ll enjoy a great shampoo, blowing dry + styling and you’ll emerge fresh, feeling good and ready to face the world! Like me!!!
lallalalala beautiful hair just in time for Christmas! :D
With Isabel!
I can’t wait to try the new Keratin Treatment at Essensuals! Will definitely blog about it when I’ve tried it! Especially elated that Bel is my stylist because then I’ll have plenty of chances to catch up, chit chat with her while doing my hair. Better than awkward silence with a stranger fussing over you?? 2 to as long as 4,5 hours in the salon, you need time to fly!
To book an appointment at Essensuals (Bugis), please call them at 6333 0039 instead of a walk-in alright? It’s a popular salon and with Christmas + New Year’s Eve + CNY nearing, they are just bursting with customers and bookings!
If you have any questions about your hair or would like to find out more about Essensuals (Bugis), why not ask the Professional Team on their Formspring and Facebook page? They would gladly solve all your hair woes and assist you with your queries ;)
To just end off my awesome experience, I have a little treat for you!!!
Quote my name “Melissa Jane” when you visit Essensuals (Bugis) to get 10% of all services!
Have fun and enjoy!!!
Wishing you a Merry Christmas and a fantastic new year ahead!
Filter Presents a Christmas Eve Special: Vice Convent – Episode XXII: Mistletoe Madness, Monday 24 December 2012
Celebrate the festive season with us at Filter Members Club as we deck the halls out with bangers and mistletoes for Vice Convent – Episode XXII: Mistletoe Madness!
We’ll designate a few mistletoe hotspots for all you couples out there looking for an excuse to have a night of debaucherous fun! Join the sexy santarinas and little helpers in sipping on champagne and sucking on candy canes because what happens under the mistletoe, stays under the mistletoe.
For table reservations speak to Benjamin, Langan, Cedric, Phil or simply email popbottles@filterclub.sg.
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Mink Christmas Eve Special: XMAS Eve Rager (Mon)
Mink Presents XMAS Eve Rager, Monday 24 December 2012
Let your imaginations run wild this Christmas eve and breathe life into this mystical land of ours by visualizing Mink’s interior freezing over, giving new meaning to poppin’ bottles on ice!
Whether you’ve been good or bad this year, get ready to over-indulge in some serious merry-making at Mink amidst our santarinas and mistletoes, even if it is for one night of pure decadence.
For table reservations speak to Jeremy, Langan, Cedric, Phil or other Mink team members or simply email mink@massive.sg.
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Playhouse Christmas Special: Santa’s Little Helpers (Thurs – Tues)
Playhouse Presents Santa’s Little Helpers, Thursday 20 December – Tuesday 25 December 2012
It’s that special time of year again! Yet the party, quite literally, never stops at Playhouse and we’re proud to present our newest theme which debuts this Thursday: Santa’s Little Helpers!
We cordially invite you to spend this celebratory time of year with us, the season where everybody loses their inhibitions and participates in the festivities – over here at Playhouse it’s no different as Santa’s little helpers are gearing up to get you in that Christmasy mood! Who knows, you might even spot them under the mistletoe! Open 6 days a week, we hope to see you at Playhouse sooner rather than later.
For table reservations or invitations speak to Edison, Benjamin, Langan, Cedric, Phil or simply email playhouse@massive.sg.
<Insurgence Parties> [MON] Wonder Emporium [WED] Pangaea: Naughty/Nice [FRI] Heavy Hitters: The Naked Waxing Girl Search [SAT] Le Noir X’mas Lockdown
[MON 24 DEC]
X’mas Eve
WONDER EMPORIUM
Mon 24 Dec 2012 / Attica
This Christmas Eve, wander into our enchanted Wonder Emporium where we put the magic in your party from life-sized toys, dancing ballerinas, and maybe even real-life toy soldiers. Dream a little dream with us as we also present the debut of our FEMMEBOTS, an eccentric wild bunch guaranteed to inject madness.
Club rules apply
Attica – 3A River Valley Road #01-03 Clarke Quay Singapore 179020
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[WED 26 DEC]
Pangaea Rock Chaos presents
NAUGHTY/NICE
A Boxing Day Giveaway Special: Bags from Ares by Sandra Holstad
Wed 26 Dec 2012 / 10pm / Pangaea
As we approach the end of the year, have you been naughty or nice? Come on down to Pangaea and let our santarinas decide as we give away elegant ladies’ bags from Ares by Sandra Holstad.
RSVP submission closes strictly at 6pm on 26 December.
Kindly call us at +65 9186 6213 for table reservations.
Age limit for gentlemen – 21 years and over
Dress code – Red & White
Entrance of Pangaea is located next to TCC Cafe and Robinsons at The Shoppes at Marina Bay Sands, Basement 2.
Club rules apply
Pangaea – 2 Bayfront Ave, Marina Bay Sands Crystal Pavillion South B2-05, Singapore 018956
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[FRI 28 DEC]
Heavy Hitters presents
THE NAKED WAXING GIRL SEARCH
Fri 28 Dec 2012 / 10pm till late / Attica Too
Naked Waxing, the newest sexiest brand in the city is on the search for the perfect girl that captures that heady mix of energy, sensuality and femininity. So come on down and support the girl who you think should win the Naked Waxing Girl Search.
Kindly call us at +65 9271 4446 for table reservations.
Club rules apply
Attica Too – 3A River Valley Road #01-03 Clarke Quay Singapore 179020
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[SAT 29 DEC]
Le Noir presents
Le Noir X’mas Lockdown
Sat 29 Dec 2012 / Lockdown begins 10pm (No entry once Lockdown starts) / Le Noir
On the 5th day of Christmas, Santa decided to throw a party for the naughty, sexxxy and the thirsty. Experience the original Le Noir party with X’mas Lockdown. At Le Noir X’mas Lockdown, we’re all about giving, and you get to decide if everyone shares, share free-flow that is. Take part and win our challenges and you get to decide if you want to walk away with a juicy prize or grant free-flow for everyone in the room!
THE RULES: Strictly dressed in Red or/and White, no leaving of premises, no toilet or smoke breaks, no puking. Lockdown lasts until someone breaks ‘the rules’.
Free entry for ladies dressed in Red & White / Men $30
Kindly call us at +65 9186 6213 for table reservations.
Club rules apply
Le Noir – 3C River Valley Road #01-01 Clarke Quay Singapore 179022
“Do what?” you ask. I DON’T KNOW. LET’S FIGURE THAT OUT TOGETHER, MOTHERFUCKERS.
Feel free to stop reading this if your career is going great, you’re thrilled with your life and you’re happy with your relationships. Enjoy the rest of your day, friend, this article is not for you. You’re doing a great job, we’re all proud of you. So you don’t feel like you wasted your click, here’s a picture of Lenny Kravitz wearing a gigantic scarf.
For the rest of you, I want you to try something: Name five impressive things about yourself. Write them down or just shout them out loud to the room. But here’s the catch — you’re not allowed to list anything you are (i.e., I’m a nice guy, I’m honest), but instead can only list things that you do (i.e., I just won a national chess tournament, I make the best chili in Massachusetts). If you found that difficult, well, this is for you, and you are going to fucking hate hearing it. My only defense is that this is what I wish somebody had said to me around 1995 or so.
#6. The World Only Cares About What It Can Get from You
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Let’s say that the person you love the most has just been shot. He or she is lying in the street, bleeding and screaming. A guy rushes up and says, “Step aside.” He looks over your loved one’s bullet wound and pulls out a pocket knife — he’s going to operate right there in the street.
Getty “OK, which one is the injured one?”
You ask, “Are you a doctor?”
The guy says, “No.”
You say, “But you know what you’re doing, right? You’re an old Army medic, or …”
At this point the guy becomes annoyed. He tells you that he is a nice guy, he is honest, he is always on time. He tells you that he is a great son to his mother and has a rich life full of fulfilling hobbies, and he boasts that he never uses foul language.
Confused, you say, “How does any of that fucking matter when my (wife/husband/best friend/parent) is lying here bleeding! I need somebody who knows how to operate on bullet wounds! Can you do that or not?!?”
Now the man becomes agitated — why are you being shallow and selfish? Do you not care about any of his other good qualities? Didn’t you just hear him say that he always remembers his girlfriend’s birthday? In light of all of the good things he does, does it really matter if he knows how to perform surgery?
In that panicked moment, you will take your bloody hands and shake him by the shoulders, screaming, “Yes, I’m saying that none of that other shit matters, because in this specific situation, I just need somebody who can stop the bleeding, you crazy fucking asshole.”
Getty “I don’t get it. Would it help if I put on a lab jacket? Here, one sec, let me just …”
So here is my terrible truth about the adult world: You are in that very situation every single day. Only you are the confused guy with the pocket knife. All of society is the bleeding gunshot victim.
If you want to know why society seems to shun you, or why you seem to get no respect, it’s because society is full of people who need things. They need houses built, they need food to eat, they need entertainment, they need fulfilling sexual relationships. You arrived at the scene of that emergency, holding your pocket knife, by virtue of your birth — the moment you came into the world, you became part of a system designed purely to see to people’s needs.
Getty “Here’s that shit you needed. Now fuck off.”
Either you will go about the task of seeing to those needs by learning a unique set of skills, or the world will reject you, no matter how kind, giving and polite you are. You will be poor, you will be alone, you will be left out in the cold.
Does that seem mean, or crass, or materialistic? What about love and kindness — don’t those things matter? Of course. As long as they result in you doing things for people that they can’t get elsewhere. For you see …
#5. The Hippies Were Wrong
Getty
Here is the greatest scene in the history of movies (WARNING: EXTREME NSFW LANGUAGE):
For those of you who can’t watch videos, it’s the famous speech Alec Baldwin gives in the cinematic masterpiece Glengarry Glenn Ross. Baldwin’s character — whom you assume is the villain — addresses a room full of dudes and tears them a new asshole, telling them that they’re all about to be fired unless they “close” the sales they’ve been assigned:
“Nice guy? I don’t give a shit. Good father? Fuck you! Go home and play with your kids. If you want to work here, close.”
It’s brutal, rude and borderline sociopathic, and also it is an honest and accurate expression of what the world is going to expect from you. The difference is that, in the real world, people consider it so wrong to talk to you that way that they’ve decided it’s better to simply let you keep failing.
Getty “First graders, welcome to Mr. Baldwin’s third period art class — is everyone here? Well, I’m goin’ anyway.”
That scene changed my life. I’d program my alarm clock to play it for me every morning if I knew how. Alec Baldwin was nominated for an Oscar for that movie and that’s the only scene he’s in. As smarter people have pointed out, the genius of that speech is that half of the people who watch it think that the point of the scene is “Wow, what must it be like to have such an asshole boss?” and the other half think, “Fuck yes, let’s go out and sell some goddamned real estate!”
“If you were in that room, some of you would understand this as a work, but feed off the energy of the message anyway, welcome the coach’s cursing at you, ‘this guy is awesome!’; while some of you would take it personally, this guy is a jerk, you have no right to talk to me like that, or — the standard maneuver when narcissism is confronted with a greater power — quietly seethe and fantasize about finding information that will out him as a hypocrite. So satisfying.”
Getty “I swear, if he mentions my hair, I’ll slap his face so har– Yes, sir, I’m listening. I’m sorry.”
That excerpt is from an insightful critique of “hipsters” and why they seem to have so much trouble getting jobs (that doesn’t begin to do it justice, go read the whole thing), and the point is that the difference in those two attitudes — bitter vs. motivated — largely determines whether or not you’ll succeed in the world. For instance, some people want to respond to that speech with Tyler Durden’s line from Fight Club: “You are not your job.”
But, well, actually, you totally are. Granted, your “job” and your means of employment might not be the same thing, but in both cases you are nothing more than the sum total of your useful skills. For instance, being a good mother is a job that requires a skill. It’s something a person can do that is useful to other members of society. But make no mistake: Your “job” — the useful thing you do for other people — is all you are.
There is a reason why surgeons get more respect than comedy writers. There is a reason mechanics get more respect than unemployed hipsters. There is a reason your job will become your label if your death makes the news (“NFL Linebacker Dies in Murder/Suicide”). Tyler said, “You are not your job,” but he also founded and ran a successful soap company and became the head of an international social and political movement. He was totally his job.
Getty It was the irony that many people missed from that movie.
Or think of it this way: Remember when Chick-fil-A came out against gay marriage? And how despite the protests, the company continues to sell millions of sandwiches every day? It’s not because the country agrees with them; it’s because they do their job of making delicious sandwiches well. And that’s all that matters.
You don’t have to like it. I don’t like it when it rains on my birthday. It rains anyway. Clouds form and precipitation happens. People have needs and thus assign value to the people who meet them. These are simple mechanisms of the universe and they do not respond to our wishes.
Getty “This is bullshit. I have a completely clean criminal record, and this is the thanks I get?”
If you protest that you’re not a shallow capitalist materialist and that you disagree that money is everything, I can only say: Who said anything about money? You’re missing the larger point.
#4. What You Produce Does Not Have to Make Money, But It Does Have to Benefit People
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Let’s try a non-money example so you don’t get hung up on that. The demographic that Cracked writes for is heavy on 20-something males. So on our message boards and in my many inboxes I read several dozen stories a year from miserable, lonely guys who insist that women won’t come near them despite the fact that they are just the nicest guys in the world. I can explain what is wrong with this mindset, but it would probably be better if I let Alec Baldwin explain it:
In this case, Baldwin is playing the part of the attractive women in your life. They won’t put it as bluntly as he does — society has trained us not to be this honest with people — but the equation is the same. “Nice guy? Who gives a shit? If you want to work here, close.”
So, what do you bring to the table? Because the Zooey Deschanel lookalike in the bookstore that you’ve been daydreaming about moisturizes her face for an hour every night and feels guilty when she eats anything other than salad for lunch. She’s going to be a surgeon in 10 years. What do you do?
Getty “Well, I’m fucking wicked at capture the flag.”
“What, so you’re saying that I can’t get girls like that unless I have a nice job and make lots of money?”
No, your brain jumps to that conclusion so you have an excuse to write off everyone who rejects you by thinking that they’re just being shallow and selfish. I’m asking what do you offer? Are you smart? Funny? Interesting? Talented? Ambitious? Creative? OK, now what do you do to demonstrate those attributes to the world? Don’t say that you’re a nice guy — that’s the bare minimum. Pretty girls have guys being nice to them 36 times a day. The patient is bleeding in the street. Do you know how to operate or not?
“Well, I’m not sexist or racist or greedy or shallow or abusive! Not like those other douchebags!”
I’m sorry, I know that this is hard to hear, but if all you can do is list a bunch of faults you don’t have, then back the fuck away from the patient. There’s a witty, handsome guy with a promising career ready to step in and operate.
Getty “Wait, I said I wouldn’t hit you!”
Does that break your heart? OK, so now what? Are you going to mope about it, or are you going to learn how to do surgery? It’s up to you, but don’t complain about how girls fall for jerks; they fall for those jerks because those jerks have other things they can offer. “But I’m a great listener!” Are you? Because you’re willing to sit quietly in exchange for the chance to be in the proximity of a pretty girl (and spend every second imagining how soft her skin must be)? Well guess what, there’s another guy in her life who also knows how to do that, and he can play the guitar. Saying that you’re a nice guy is like a restaurant whose only selling point is that the food doesn’t make you sick. You’re like a new movie whose title is This Movie Is in English, and its tagline is “The actors are clearly visible.”
I think this is why you can be a “nice guy” and still feel terrible about yourself. Specifically …
#3. You Hate Yourself Because You Don’t Do Anything
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“So, what, you’re saying that I should pick up a book on how to get girls?”
Only if step one in the book is “Start making yourself into the type of person girls want to be around.”
Getty “Come ooooon. I know I hid some vodka in here somewhere.”
Because that’s the step that gets skipped — it’s always “How can I get a job?” and not “How can I become the type of person employers want?” It’s “How can I get pretty girls to like me?” instead of “How can I become the type of person that pretty girls like?” See, because that second one could very well require giving up many of your favorite hobbies and paying more attention to your appearance, and God knows what else. You might even have to change your personality.
“But why can’t I find someone who just likes me for me?” you ask. The answer is because humans need things. The victim is bleeding, and all you can do is look down and complain that there aren’t more gunshot wounds that just fix themselves?
Here’s another video (NSFW):
Everyone who watched that video instantly became a little happier, although not all for the same reasons. Can you do that for people? Why not? What’s stopping you from strapping on your proverbial thong and cape and taking to your proverbial stage and flapping your proverbial penis at people? That guy knows the secret to winning at human life: that doing … whatever you call that … was better than not doing it.
“But I’m not good at anything!” Well, I have good news — throw enough hours of repetition at it and you can get sort of good at anything. I was the world’s shittiest writer when I was an infant. I was only slightly better at 25. But while I was failing miserably at my career, I wrote in my spare time for eight straight years, an article a week, before I ever made real money off it. It took 13 years for me to get good enough to make the New York Times best-seller list. It took me probably 20,000 hours of practice to sand the edges off my sucking.
Don’t like the prospect of pouring all of that time into a skill? Well, I have good news and bad news. The good news is that the sheer act of practicing will help you come out of your shell — I got through years of tedious office work because I knew that I was learning a unique skill on the side. People quit because it takes too long to see results, because they can’t figure out that the process is the result.
The bad news is that you have no other choice. If you want to work here, close.
Because in my non-expert opinion, you don’t hate yourself because you have low self-esteem, or because other people were mean to you. You hate yourself because you don’t do anything. Not even you can just “love you for you” — that’s why you’re miserable and sending me private messages asking me what I think you should do with your life.
Getty Step One: Get up.
Do the math: How much of your time is spent consuming things other people made (TV, music, video games, websites) versus making your own? Only one of those adds to your value as a human being.
And if you hate hearing this and are responding with something you heard as a kid that sounds like “It’s what’s on the inside that matters!” then I can only say …
#2. What You Are Inside Only Matters Because of What It Makes You Do
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Being in the business I’m in, I know dozens of aspiring writers. They think of themselves as writers, they introduce themselves as writers at parties, they know that deep inside, they have the heart of a writer. The only thing they’re missing is that minor final step, where they actually fucking write things.
But really, does that matter? Is “writing things” all that important when deciding who is and who is not truly a “writer”?
For the love of God, yes.
Getty I’ve known “writers” who produced less content than what’s on this woman’s grocery list.
See, there’s a common defense to everything I’ve said so far, and to every critical voice in your life. It’s the thing your ego is saying to you in order to prevent you from having to do the hard work of improving: “I know I’m a good person on the inside.” It may also be phrased as “I know who I am” or “I just have to be me.”
Don’t get me wrong; who you are inside is everything — the guy who built a house for his family from scratch did it because of who he was inside. Every bad thing you’ve ever done has started with a bad impulse, some thought ricocheting around inside your skull until you had to act on it. And every good thing you’ve done is the same — “who you are inside” is the metaphorical dirt from which your fruit grows.
Getty Notice how the camera is pointed up, and not at the base of the tree?
But here’s what everyone needs to know, and what many of you can’t accept:
“You” are nothing but the fruit.
Nobody cares about your dirt. “Who you are inside” is meaningless aside from what it produces for other people.
Inside, you have great compassion for poor people. Great. Does that result in you doing anything about it? Do you hear about some terrible tragedy in your community and say, “Oh, those poor children. Let them know that they are in my thoughts”? Because fuck you if so — find out what they need and help provide it. A hundred million people watched that Kony video, virtually all of whom kept those poor African children “in their thoughts.” What did the collective power of those good thoughts provide? Jack fucking shit. Children die every day because millions of us tell ourselves that caring is just as good as doing. It’s an internal mechanism controlled by the lazy part of your brain to keep you from actually doing work.
Getty “I just wanted to tell you that you’re in my thoughts. Good luck — let me know if that cured you.”
How many of you are walking around right now saying, “She/he would love me if she/he only knew what an interesting person I am!” Really? How do all of your interesting thoughts and ideas manifest themselves in the world? What do they cause you to do? If your dream girl or guy had a hidden camera that followed you around for a month, would they be impressed with what they saw? Remember, they can’t read your mind — they can only observe. Would they want to be a part of that life?
Because all I’m asking you to do is apply the same standard to yourself that you apply to everyone else. Don’t you have that annoying Christian friend whose only offer to help anyone ever is to “pray for them”? Doesn’t it drive you nuts? I’m not even commenting on whether or not prayer works; it doesn’t change the fact that they chose the one type of help that doesn’t require them to get off the sofa. They abstain from every vice, they think clean thoughts, their internal dirt is as pure as can be, but what fruit grows from it? And they should know this better than anybody — I stole the fruit metaphor from the Bible. Jesus said something to the effect of “a tree is judged by its fruit” over and over and over. Granted, Jesus never said, “If you want to work here, close.” No, he said, “Every tree that does not bear good fruit is cut down and thrown into the fire.”
Getty “And then a buffalo will stare stupidly into your soul while slowly chewing grass and softly farting.”
The people didn’t react well to being told that, just as the salesmen didn’t react well to Alec Baldwin telling them that they needed to grow some balls or resign themselves to shining his shoes. Which brings us to the final point …
#1. Everything Inside You Will Fight Improvement
Getty
The human mind is a miracle, and you will never see it spring more beautifully into action than when it is fighting against evidence that it needs to change. Your psyche is equipped with layer after layer of defense mechanisms designed to shoot down anything that might keep things from staying exactly where they are- ask any addict.
So even now, some of you reading this are feeling your brain bombard you with knee-jerk reasons to reject it. From experience, I can say that these seem to come in the form of …
*Intentionally Interpreting Any Criticism as an Insult
“Who is he to call me lazy and worthless! A good person would never talk to me like this! He wrote this whole thing just to feel superior to me and to make me feel bad about my life! I’m going to think up my own insult to even the score!”
*Focusing on the Messenger to Avoid Hearing the Message
“Who is THIS guy to tell ME how to live? Oh, like he’s so high and mighty! It’s just some dumb writer on the Internet! I’m going to go dig up something on him that reassures me that he’s stupid, and that everything he’s saying is stupid! This guy is so pretentious, it makes me puke! I watched his old rap video on YouTube and thought his rhymes sucked!”
Getty “When you get to where I am in life, you feel free to give me advice! Until then, you’re nothing but meat and guesses.”
*Focusing on the Tone to Avoid Hearing the Content
“I’m going to dig through here until I find a joke that is offensive when taken out of context, and then talk and think only about that! I’ve heard that a single offensive word can render an entire book invisible!”
*Revising Your Own History
“Things aren’t so bad! I know that I was threatening suicide last month, but I’m feeling better now! It’s entirely possible that if I just keep doing exactly what I’m doing, eventually things will work out! I’ll get my big break, and if I keep doing favors for that pretty girl, eventually she’ll come around!”
*Pretending That Any Self-Improvement Would Somehow Be Selling Out Your True Self
“Oh, so I guess I’m supposed to get rid of all of my manga and instead go to the gym for six hours a day and get a spray tan like those Jersey Shore douchebags? Because THAT IS THE ONLY OTHER OPTION.”
Getty “Way to leave ‘the hood’ behind, asshole. New house or not, you’ll always be white trash!”
And so on. Remember, misery is comfortable. It’s why so many people prefer it. Happiness takes effort.
Also, courage. It’s incredibly comforting to know that as long as you don’t create anything in your life, then nobody can attack the thing you created.
It’s so much easier to just sit back and criticize other people’s creations. This movie is stupid. That couple’s kids are brats. That other couple’s relationship is a mess. That rich guy is shallow. This restaurant sucks. This Internet writer is an asshole. I’d better leave a mean comment demanding that the website fire him. See, I created something.
Oh, wait, did I forget to mention that part? Yeah, whatever you try to build or create — be it a poem, or a new skill, or a new relationship — you will find yourself immediately surrounded by non-creators who trash it. Maybe not to your face, but they’ll do it. Your drunk friends do not want you to get sober. Your fat friends do not want you to start a fitness regimen. Your jobless friends do not want to see you embark on a career.
Just remember, they’re only expressing their own fear, since trashing other people’s work is another excuse to do nothing. “Why should I create anything when the things other people create suck? I would totally have written a novel by now, but I’m going to wait for something good, I don’t want to write the next Twilight!” As long as they never produce anything, it will forever be perfect and beyond reproach. Or if they do produce something, they’ll make sure they do it with detached irony. They’ll make it intentionally bad to make it clear to everyone else that this isn’t their real effort. Their real effort would have been amazing. Not like the shit you made.
Read our article comments — when they get nasty, it’s always from the same angle: Cracked needs to fire this columnist. This asshole needs to stop writing. Don’t make any more videos. It always boils down to “Stop creating. This is different from what I would have made, and the attention you’re getting is making me feel bad about myself.”
Don’t be that person. If you are that person, don’t be that person any more. This is what’s making people hate you. This is what’s making you hate yourself.
Getty What are you going to do with it? Hunt witches or kick off the Olympics?
So how about this: one year. The end of 2013, that’s our deadline. Or a year from whenever you read this. While other people are telling you “Let’s make a New Year’s resolution to lose 15 pounds this year!” I’m going to say let’s pledge to do fucking anything — add any skill, any improvement to your human tool set, and get good enough at it to impress people. Don’t ask me what — hell, pick something at random if you don’t know. Take a class in karate, or ballroom dancing, or pottery. Learn to bake. Build a birdhouse. Learn massage. Learn a programming language. Film a porno. Adopt a superhero persona and fight crime. Start a YouTube vlog. Write for Cracked.
But the key is, I don’t want you to focus on something great that you’re going to make happen to you (“I’m going to find a girlfriend, I’m going to make lots of money …”). I want you to purely focus on giving yourself a skill that would make you ever so slightly more interesting and valuable to other people.
Getty “Holy shit, by learning Spanish, I just gained the ability to speak to 400 million people I previously couldn’t.”
“I don’t have the money to take a cooking class.” Then fucking Google “how to cook.” They’ve even filtered out the porn now, it’s easier than ever. Damn it, you have to kill those excuses. Or they will kill you.
If you want to make note of your project in the forum thread or the comments and check in this time next year, knock yourself out. I’ll be curious to see if even one person actually does this, but if so we’ll look back, not just on whether or not we actually followed through, but why. You have nothing to lose, and the world needs you. Here’s a video of a corgi rolling down some stairs.
Back in November I was just planning a casual shoot at Emerald Hill with William (he’s experienced at shooting race queens and events etc). First time shooting with him and it was fun! Really informal and relaxing (though I honestly wasn’t in my “top form”) and personally felt that the photos produced certainly weren’t my best. Not William’s fault – the model’s not really performing, partly because it has been awhile since I modeled :P self blame!
Enjoy the photos, nonetheless! William still did a great job with the edits, angles and lighting. Yayyy!
Bodycon Dress from MDS Collections
My personal favourite shot because I looked cheerful and happy!
I like the mood here – it’s both soft and lively.
A shot I dedicated to Ash <3
In my opinion, best shot in the entire shoot. It’s a profile + portfolio worthy picture thanks to William! The angle, colour tones and my expression (due to lighting as well) was just perfect here ;)
When I first saw this shot on Will’s camera I was like “Eh this looks interesting. I look kinda pouty and throwing a small tantrum in a silent, prissy way.” Hurmpppph.
Floral Dress from ASOS
The editing made this picture really nice. Love it! By the way, I took awhile to get this sitting pose right because it’s actually not easy to sit on the floor in this manner and try and look pretty while also trying to cover your legs with the skirt and ignoring numerous ants crawling around….(behind the scenes talk)
Somehow this looks a little Kpop princess. By chance. And that wonderful glare from the back!
Hope you like the amateur shots, darlings!
For William’s portfolio, please click here. His trademark is BK Foto.
For apparel sponsorship or modeling opportunities, kindly contact me at melissajaneho@gmail.com!
With America’s Next Top Model and its many successor versions (by country, of course) and now the latest in the #TopModel series being Asia’s Next Top Model, it’s just the right time to reveal how you may just land your first magazine cover! It may not be Harper’s Bazaar, or Vogue, then again you may not even need to try as hard as the girls in the branded series and experience all that drama.
Unless you want to.
I was just reading a couple of articles, and got inspired to write this post:
[Adapted from ModelMayhem’s edu Library]
The two basic methods
The first option is to shoot with photographers who regularly get published. Go to a newsstand and pick up the magazine you want to be in. Flip through the pages and see who the photographers are. Next, contact the photographer and set up a shoot with the intention of having your images submitted to that magazine. The photographer may get pre-approval from the magazine to shoot you for a feature, or the photographer may shoot you on “spec.” Shooting on spec means the photographer does the shoot without pre-approval and submits to the magazine anyway, in hopes that they use the images.
The second option is to take matters into your own hands. Find the best photographer in your area, shoot the style of pictures you see in the magazines you want to be in, and submit them yourself. Go to the inside few pages of most magazines and look for the email or mailing addresses of the Editor and Chief or Art Director. You can also go to the magazine’s website and usually find the contact information there. Once you have the contact info, start introducing yourself and submitting your photos. You may even consider actual prints via FEDEX to art directors. Everyone opens an overnight FEDEX package, right?
Don’t be afraid of “NO”
For every magazine cover you land, there were sometimes up to 6 other magazines that passed on the same image. Perhaps you were to submit a web size sample of your image to several magazines at the same time. Some editors would say no, others would say it’s not the right look, and still others wouldn’t respond at all. However, eventually you might just get a YES! An image could be sat on for a whole year before it was picked up for a cover. You just have to believe in yourself and your works.
As a model, you have to evaluate your goals. Do you want to make small amounts of money from beginner photographers paying you? Or do you have a bigger vision? Would you rather shoot with the best photographers, submit to magazines, and make a name for yourself? That’s where you have an increased chance of getting sponsors, contracts, and/or endorsements. Enlarge your vision.
You could get to the point where you wouldn’t shoot with a photographer who wasn’t up to your standards, no matter how much they paid you. To the contrary, you would seek out the best photographers and pay them instead. Get the works? You just want the results, the best photographs. Sometimes the process of getting there wouldn’t matter. Would it? As Tyra said “We don’t like mean girls.” So bear that in mind.
Why PAY for the BEST photographers?
Ability to pick which images are retouched
Being provided with both high resolution and web size images. High resolution images are necessary for publication
Ability to choose the looks/outfits/locations that you want and feel are the best
Freedom to submit the images on your own to publications
Always discuss your plans for the images with the photographer before the shoot. Make sure the photographer is ok with you submitting to magazines on your own. Usually the photographers would be happy to have you submit to magazines because it was promotion and marketing for them.
Always discuss with the photographer ahead of time the shoot details, such as high resolution images, and any other questions you might have.
Why not shoot with just anyone? Despite being Paid!
You have to protect your image at all costs. Look through the photographer’s portfolio and find their worst image. You could be their next worst image. You have to ask yourself, does the $200 you made from the shoot justify having bad pictures of yourself circulating around the internet forever?
Other disadvantages of doing TFCD shoots and some paid shoots:
Photographer typically decides which images are retouched
Typically only web size images are given
Photographer usually shoots what he/she wants, which may not necessarily be exactly what you had in mind
Often you will have to sign a release that does not allow you to submit your images to magazines
As Robert Greene stated in his famous book, The 48 Laws of Power, “Despise the Free Lunch.What is offered for free is dangerous – it usually involves either a trick or a hidden obligation. What has worth is worth paying for. By paying your own way you stay clear of gratitude, guilt, and deceit. It is also often wise to pay the full price – there is no cutting corners with excellence.”
How do you find the right photographer so you have images to submit to magazines? The simple answer is, you have to find a photographer who gives you a finished product good enough to go directly on a magazine cover. These photographers are few and far between.
But don’t give up and you’ll get there! Find your niche and work towards that, and focus.
Fashion Consultant/Enthusiast.
Melissa Jane Ferosha 